Who Leads the Generational Gap on Allied Drive?

I must precede my words with the statement that I do not purport to represent anyone other than myself. My blog reflects my opinions, my observations and my life experiences, and I equally support anyone in our community who wishes to express their opinions, observations or life experiences regardless of what they are or what statements they make. I may not agree, but I wholly support everyone's right to express themselves.

The very fuel that produced this blog was rooted in my feelings of being marginalized among the voices that represent our community. Throughout all the various politics that have taken place over the years I have spent here, my experience has been that some voices express our interests while others fall to the wayside. I did not find it effective to battle at meetings over what defines us as Allied Drive residents and I do not have the energy to figure out political agendas of anyone who comes forward to say this is what all of Allied Drive wants.

I would be the first to say that no one person, or not even a group of 30 individuals could accurately reflect what all the residents of Allied Drive want. Anyone who has knocked on doors here would know that there are so many different people here of different races, ages, educational levels, income levels, cultural backgrounds and primary languages spoken. If there existed a group of people that represented all the various groups of residents, I could not see there being any way that they could agree on something so minimal as the food served at a meal, let alone more important issues that relate to housing, education or economics. I think that is why there are so many groups and associations out here - to allow for something for everyone to belong to.

However in such a truly diverse community, it is inevitable that some voices will rise and others will be diluted, and it is all based on how much energy one wants to put into ensuring their voice is heard. Not too long ago, I was quoted as saying how can anyone get upset over being put out of Allied Drive? Really speaking, if all of us were told that this area was being turned into a sanctuary for homeless cats and we all must leave, though our people are diverse, we are common in the fact that we are survivors. We will make do. I think most of us, in this hypothetical example, would not divert the energy into voicing the unfairness of cats taking precedence over people. We will just do what we need to do to ensure our survival. If big man says it's time to go, I think it is time to go.

So among all the things in life we could divert our energy to, our kids, our dogs, our careers, our credit reports, our family relations, how many of us would consider it a wise investment of time and energy to combat the politics of voices representing Allied Drive to say something like "Hey, I think with some education and support and a lot of self-confidence building, many people here could become responsible home owners, and I think that would impact Madison's poverty issues"? I'll tell you from personal experience that I will say something like that once, twice, maybe three times, and maybe if I am truly frustrated, I'll voice it one more time, but after that, if I am still made to feel like a troll who has these ideas and concepts that are so ludicrous and far-fetched, I am basically done talking about it.

I love blogging because it provides a document that anyone in the world can reference without putting me in the frustrating position of repeating myself. So I journal today about who leads the generational gap on Allied Drive.

About a year ago, the entire staff at my work went to a motivational retreat in Milwaukee where various celebrities talked about success and perseverance. One of the esteemed speakers was none other than Mr. Bill Cosby. What struck me as a parallel between Mr. Cosby and my parents is with some of our elders who disapprove of the younger generation and the direction they are guiding our community. Similarly, Mr. Cosby disapproves of the direction the younger generation is taking his community. He often publicly voices his disapproval of hip-hop culture and the lifestyles of the younger generation. His comments prompted several guardians of the younger generation to voice their defense and the New York Times referred to the battle as "generational warfare."

One of the arguments is that the younger generation is a product of the older one and it is hypocritical for the older generation to criticize the younger generation without taking a look at themselves first. Mr. Cosby accuses today's youth of neglecting their history and overlooking the gains paid for by the blood of their ancestors. The flipside to this accusation refers to Mr. Cosby's younger years and the lessons he preached back then. Ironically, many popular hip-hop artists cite Mr. Bill Cosby as their inspiration.

Through the winter months, we had opened our home to many of the youth that "hang out" on the streets of Allied Drive to come someplace safe where they can eat (if we have food available), drink some soda and play some video games. Through this experience, I got to know how savvy our 15 and 16 year olds are when it comes to basic survival. Many of these kids were living in homes that were not very functional in the traditional sense, and in many ways, they were out on their own. I always heard people say that kids are amazing, but until I really got to know some of the youth that our community views as thugs or trouble, I never really appreciated it.

So one day, we have about 5 young people over at our place, all of whom are hungry, so we order pizza, of course with it's accompanying challenges of getting a pizza delivery on Allied Drive. Simultaneously, one of the hip-hop tracks from the video games came on that had the line "If ya hungry, pizzaman, he don't come around here" ... many of the other lyrics in the song were identified as a reflection of their own experiences of "life on the street" here on Allied Drive (not to undermine a real "life on the street" that youth experience in far more serious "ghettos" within major cities like Chicago or LA). For months onward, when that song came on, it was referred to as the Allied Drive anthem and it was expected that at that moment, in the video game, the player would prevail. How dare you die off while the Allied anthem is on! We had a lot of fun together, despite all the ugliness that likely was experienced outside of our home.

I made our declaration of the Allied anthem public in recognition of what I experienced with the kids I hung out with over the winter months. I wish more people could see what I saw or I wish some of the kids would have to courage or drive to write something that could be published and shared for the rest of Madison (and the world) to see that really reflects what is going through their minds. Maybe one day that will happen, but for now, this song is my best reflection of their experience as I see it.

Recently, the Allied Dunn's Marsh Neighborhood Association advised me that they are considering formal action, such as a protest, against my personal declaration of this song being an anthem without the Association's consent. I would like to make clear that the Allied Dunn's Marsh Neighborhood Association does not endorse anything that I say or do. And my declaration of this song as the anthem was in fun and jest, just as many of our community members proclaim themselves to be the "mayor of Allied Drive". There was a request to pull the song down, however after many experiences of witnessing kids being censored or otherwise blocked in expressing their thoughts and experiences in one form or another, I don't feel comfortable doing so. I will say that the Allied Drive anthem is in no way a formal anthem declared by Ms. Alice Howard or the Allied Dunn's Marsh Neighborhood Association, so please do not think that this song represents her or those associated with her.

All this makes me think of the generational gap and who will prevail when it comes to representing our collective voices. I have no doubt about it, the elders will prevail. If they decide to dedicate their energy into a formal protest, I am certain that the arguments will be compelling as to why such a statement is crude or inappropriate. There is always the issue of representing the positive - look at any debate about the validity of hip-hop as an expression of life. It all boils down to the question of whether life imitates art or if art imitates life.

Regardless, I would urge all members of our community the right to express themselves without any manipulation or censorship in what they wish to portray as their life experience or their opinions. Not everyone is going to agree, and I assume that my readers understand that my opinions are just that, my opinions. Accept them as that, and if you want to make your own judgment calls, feel free to do so, however make the effort to make sound judgments with complete information.

When our elders complain about our generation drinking or swearing or even having sex, we are also accused of ignoring our roots, forgetting where we came from and disregarding the sacrifices that our parents made to ensure opportunities for us. I never recall speaking to any of our youth and feeling that is the case. What I have observed however is that after being accused of not caring, we don't really care enough to set the record straight.

I can completely relate to what I have heard many kids say ... whatever.

Plans to Increase Income Must Include Financial Literacy Education

The Allied Drive Task Force recently produced a report that serves as a reference toward responding to employment and employability issues on Allied Drive. I forwarded my thoughts on the report for the Task Force to consider as follows:

To Whom It May Concern:

Upon reading the Employment and Training Report that was prepared for the Allied Task Force, I wanted to extend my appreciation to those who participated in the production of the comprehensive report that serves to coordinate many of the great services available to residents on Allied Drive. As an Allied Drive-city property resident with formal and informal experience with employment and job development for Allied Drive residents, I had one thought that I wanted to share with the Task Force to consider working into the report.

I have worked for nearly three years helping Allied Drive-area residents connect with employment opportunities working as a job developer to support employment and training staff on Allied Drive, and also as a resident, I have socialized with many of my neighbors through the years. One observation that I have made is that even with best programs and the best resources, it is very hard to meet employment objectives without addressing the need for a shift in cultural and societal values among my neighbors.

I have participated in professional and personal outreach among many communities on Allied Drive, including the expansive Latino and Asian communities. It saddens me that although ethnic cultures and even the languages we speak can be so different, one thing can remain so constant - many of us are in a crisis/survival mode that causes us to fail to look at the big picture. We are often so focused on the crisis of the day, whether it be the threat of our lights being turned off or an eviction notice, or any other such mishap, we often fail to have to ability to look three years down the line and make decisions that would benefit our long-term future.

More times than I can count, I have witnessed my neighbors not showing up to work because they were offered a one-day job that offered cash on the spot. It may not make sense to an outsider looking in, but it is very likely that individual needed cash today, and waiting for a first paycheck in two weeks was not feasible for the crisis being dealt with today. I have been in similar crunches, and in hindsight of my own situations, I can think of many responsible ways I could have responded to the crisis at hand that would have prevented financial devastation caused by things such as payday loans. However, when you are in the heat of the moment within an air of crisis caused by being around so many other people who are also in the midst of a crisis, there is a lack of sound rationale to help us navigate around financial emergencies so we often make decisions without fully evaluating the long-term impact of our decisions.

They say that the average American is two paychecks away from being homeless. I firmly believe that many Allied residents are only one paycheck away, and I speak of this from experience. In the three years that I have lived in what is now the city-owned properties, the financial fires I put out are barely at bay. My income is not the issue, rather the errors in judgment I made in my past haunt me constantly. Many of my neighbors have similar skeletons, whether it be enormous restitution fees owed to the courts, or child-support that is backed up to five-figure amounts. Our past skeletons serve as barriers in allowing us to move forward in more ways than one, and just getting a good job is not the full answer. Many of my neighbors have tried to go back to school but were ineligible for student aid due to past defaulted students loans. We can't legally drive because of thousands of dollars owed to the state for various past driving violations. We need financial education to help us learn how to legitimately navigate around these issues, many of which have easy solutions that we could easily learn with the right training.

The line between our day-to-day survival and being homeless and penniless is very fine here. In many of these situations, income is not the issue. I, along with many of my neighbors have household incomes (sometimes reportable, sometimes not reportable) exceeding $50k per year, however if our liabilities exceed our income, it really does not matter, we are all still in a big hole.

In my opinion, if we are unable to manage our income and expenses while making $10k per year, it is highly unlikely that our spending habits or our money management skills will improve with more money. It is necessary for all of us to gain an understanding of how to really manage money, and furthermore, how to effectively build wealth. Many of the crisis situations my neighbors and I experience are rooted in finances. If we can somehow invest some time and energy in teaching ourselves good financial habits, many of those crises will be eliminated, and perhaps we will make sound financial decisions that will impact our long-term future.

There are many financial literacy programs in Madison, and there are also many successful residents on Allied Drive that have gone from making $8/hour to $15/hour in less than a year. All these individuals need to be identified and I think that they would be instrumental in helping their neighbors achieve similar successes.

In conclusion, I would say that we need two things: firstly, residents need counseling to determine if full-time hours are feasible for them within the lifestyle they are currently living within. If not, then a part-time job could be springboarded into a full-time opportunity after several months of easing into a job-centered lifestyle. Secondly, financial literacy training that relates to the residents and responds to the sorts of crisis we face is required. I would urge the program to include education that would help residents proactively respond to festering situations before they explode and ultimately exercise sound judgments in the future on their own.

Thank you for considering my ideas and I look forward to seeing the fruits of our labor!

Why Allied Drive IS about race

It is often relayed in race relation circles that the best way to overcome racism is to oversee the differences of race and simply look at people for who they are. As Dr. Martin Luther King said, judge individuals by the content of their character, not by the color of their skin. That is all great in principle; however generally, people do not have such discipline. So often we assess people based on what they look like, and once you go there, you can’t backtrack and defend statements without re-connecting it to race.

As much as I would like to talk about all the great people that live on Allied Drive and all the potential that residents here hold on their own, it is nearly impossible to talk about (and often defend) Allied Drive without addressing Madison’s divides relating to race.

I wish the following people didn’t go there:

"For the person shocked at the racial divide in this city all I want to say is that the white community has been bending over backwards to help black people. We are building them community centers, giving them their own personal community police station, giving them practically free housing and intregrating them into our neighborhoods, promoting equal opportunity at the expense of more qualified white candidates etc..etc..etc..etc... And the black community is showing their appreciation for our generosity by filling up the local jails, making the entire city unsafe, ruining the public school system so badly that parents are taking their children to the suburbs or sending them to private schools and putting enormous pressure on the hard working tax payer. Twenty or thiry years ago, at least we were rewarded with a few good comedians, good barabues and some quality music from black people, but we don't even get that from them anymore. The black community now takes much more than they return. I think most native Madisonians would have perferred if they just stayed in Milwaukee or Chicago instead of moving to Madison and bringing the ghetto here with them."

"It's the black people who are causing the problems. they are predisposed to violence. get rid of the black people, and you will get rid of the crime. there is no disputing this."

"I also lived on Allied Drive circa 1967 and it was a perfectly safe neighborhood. Even back in 1967 it was one of the poorer parts of the city, but there was absolutely NO CRIME. The only difference between then and now is the demographics of the neighborhood. Back in 1967 it was all white and now it is all black. I find it quite interesting that many people blame crime on poverty, but back in 1967 none of the poor whites were causing a problem."

Source for all above comments: Channel 3000 Forums

These sorts of comments are endless. For me, the icing on the cake is when a reputed newspaper publishes editorials that defend such ignorance, as the Fitchburg Star published the words of Kurt Getknecht:

"Fitchburg's no leader in the struggle for racial equality, but it's probably no worse than most areas of the country. We're a heavily segregated community, mostly by economic status and class, which is also characteristic of much of the country, including Madison. It was mighty galling it was to listen to Lorri Wendorf's discourse on how Fitchburg residents should embrace differences, which assumed that their concerns about traffic weren't valid. Mind you, I'm not a huge defender of all things Fitchburg, but I felt surprisingly defensive of our fair city. It's difficult to fathom how funneling more traffic through a neighborhood fosters understanding and racial equality, but I probably don't understand the lofty precepts of Madison's elite. Pity the poor Fitchburg resident who had a car end up in his bedroom, a few feet from his bed. He's probably confused to learn that his attempt to prevent this from happening again is a reflection of bias."

Racism is a form of abuse and as with any other abuse, it is not up to the perpetrator to define when abuse is taking place. Furthermore, being "probably no worse than anyone else" is not a valid defense. If you are honestly thinking that you are "probably no worse than anyone else", maybe it is time to venture out and see how you really fare with the rest of the country, and maybe even the rest of the world.

Look at Madison's disproportionate rates of incarceration, home ownership and per-capita income, all among which Wisconsin and Dane County lead in racial disparities when compared to other states and counties in the US. For three years of my life, I had a job that required travel for 120 days out of the year through which I have repeatedly visited nearly every major city in the United States and I can say hands down, I have never felt the levels of unspoken discomfort about race until I came to Madison.

Allied Drive is the most disconnected area of the city when you look at bus routes and accessibility, and we have to actually fight to open up a street? I’ve sat in and observed a lot of meetings about Allied Drive and I remember hearing Fitchburg residents say that they do not want the people of Allied Drive walking up and down the streets of their community, so to back track and shift the focus to traffic safety is like listening to a rapist blame short skirts. You have got to be kidding me.

I have not written in my blog for some time because it has to be known that these issues are very tolling. It is similar to being in a difficult relationship. Sometimes you come to the conclusion that your partner is not going to change so futile efforts may be better spent toward something more constructive. Like a condo downtown. In a city that embraces differences, away from all this madness.

Roast on Milios

I had Milios for lunch today and I remembered they are another restaurant that delivers to our area, but not on Allied Drive. I remember about a month ago, there was a really bad snow storm and we didn't feel like going outside or cooking, and we were so indecisive on what to order, and finally decided that Milios would totally hit the spot. I love their sandwiches however would you believe that they made us walk over to the Boys and Girls Club to meet them? We said okay because we really wanted Milios, and the Boys and Girls Club is literally out our front door, through the neighboring building's parking lot, up a small three foot hill and we are at the back of the Boys and Girls Club. That small three foot hill was not such a small hill with all that snow. That driver could have driven another block, in my opinion. If anything, we should have gotten our delivery for half-off or something because they really did not deliver it all the way to us. Ahh well ... We made it up by not tipping the driver, which is bad I know, however the driver was the same guy who answered the phone and refused to come down to our place. I was feeling guilty for about 3 minutes until I came home to a really arrogant sounding voice mail from the driver asking us where we were at thinking we were blowing him off with our shady Allied Drive sandwich order. I haven't ordered Milio's for dinner since ...

It is MAD COLD today!

It is cold, cold, cold outside! Whenever we have inclement weather, I always think of all the people out here who do not have cars and walk in the cold to Cub Foods when they are in need of groceries.

I always see people walking with strollers and small children with bags of groceries. Cold winters are a harsh reality of our community. Even though Cub Foods is right across the street, when I didn't have a car, I used to take the bus to the West Transfer Point and walk to Copps - for me, it was a much shorter walk to the bus stop and then to Copps, and plus, you don't have to cross Verona Road's busy traffic on foot. It's only a ten minute bus ride and it actually would take longer to walk all the way across Verona Road.

I have high hopes for the Timebank outreach that will be taking place here soon and I really hope that more Allied residents take advantage of Timebank's resources when it comes to getting rides for groceries, especially when it is as cold as it is this weekend!

Winter Paintball Season?

I was trying to think of some activities that the community may participate in over the winter (not when it is as cold as it is this weekend, but maybe sometime when it is above negative thirty degrees!) and paintball came to mind! I saw on television once a group of people playing paintball in the winter snow and it really looked like a lot of fun. I am not sure how to go about getting a tournament together, but I bet anything that a lot of people would want to play, even in the cold! If anyone is interested in organizing a paintball tournament out here, there are some great resources for paintball guns and various paintball supplies online. I don't know anything about paintball however some quick research revealed that the Tippmann A-5 is one of the top selling models. I think I would need something that isn't so bulky so I could move around, but being so out of shape, I am very confident that I'd be down pretty much right away, so I think I would opt to be like a referee or something like that. A paintball gun package has everything that anyone would need to be completely armed with paint, and taking a look at all that comes with the package, it looks like this is a very serious, serious hobby.

Move Forward and Move Out, If You Really Want The American Dream?

They say that a component of what is considered the American Dream is home ownership and those of us in the city properties who aspire to buy a home and want to own a stake in this community feel like we are being somewhat punished for wanting it. The way the development plans are unfolding, those who qualify for Section 8 or prefer rental housing are offered an opportunity to move into the new developments first. The rest of us who aligned with the city’s idea of facilitating property ownership among the community’s residents will have to wait for an undisclosed amount of time for our opportunity to move.

If the new properties are ready this summer, they will be literally 25 feet from my front door. I wonder how I am going to feel, seeing a beautiful living space with gardens and all this great architecture that only accommodates Section 8 and rental housing, and does not provide a viable option for people like me who want to own a place in our next move. The architects who are designing the new buildings are very talented and the new properties are going to look spectacular. It’s going to make my current apartment look, for lack of a better term, shitty. And it’s going to be right there in front of me to salivate over every time I come in or out of my apartment.

I may be inclined to move into the new rentals. I’ll think, hell, if I am renting, I might as well rent something nice! But then something is going to nag at me, hey, why I am moving into a rental? I should be looking at buying a piece of property. Just for kicks, we may see if we can get pre-approved for a mortgage and if by chance we do, we will be faced with the difficult decision of whether we should move into a nice house anywhere in the city now, or should we continue living in a crappy apartment for that undisclosed amount of time and wait for the privilege of being one of Allied Drive's first home owners. I am thinking that the only reason I would wait for Allied Drive would be if there was a complete lack of mortgage brokers who are willing to work with first time home owners with challenges. I don’t know ...

The State Journal recently interviewed a landlord out here who expressed that the city should consider building homes immediately because there is already a ton of low income housing out here. They say that Allied Drive is over 65% vacant – I remember one of the architects early on explained to us that if they cut off the top floors of all the buildings on Allied, there will still be vacancies out here. Currently, everything out here is rental and low income. Our Alder was quoted in response as agreeing in the concept of home-ownership, however stating that the community really wants rentals to drive the first phase of the project. Who? The community? What about those of us who live in the buildings that you bought? I guess we are all the red-headed step-children who have to wait until everyone else is appeased before our needs are met. God, this feels like a really unfulfilling relationship that I have with the city. I fantasize about a mortgage broker in shining armor riding up here on a white horse to sweep me away.

The ideal would be if the city would start building the owner-based properties right away with the rentals, and the options would be lined up for us when the new properties are unveiled. This all reminds me of when we first moved into our apartment and we had no furniture whatsoever. I had some friends back in Chicago who offered me some really nice furniture, I just had to rent a truck and get some help to move it. There were a lot of challenges in doing that due to finances and mobility restrictions I had to abide to. Just to get some basic furniture, I went St. Vincent DePaul and got pretty much everything that I immediately needed. My intention was still to get the really nice furniture and donate my interim furniture back to St Vincent’s.

Three years later, I am still sitting on my St Vincent’s couch and the furniture in Chicago is still sitting in storage. I’ve had opportunities to get the new furniture, but for one reason or another, I never did. I guess because I didn’t really need it and I was comfortable with what I had.

It’s one of the tragedies of missed opportunities ... The city is making us move, that is inevitable for all of us here. However, if they really want to guide us into home ownership on Allied, they should relish the opportunity of lining up the timelines to make it convenient for us to do so. Have both options ready at the same time so that no one has to wait for an undisclosed amount of time to move into a house. If the city makes the home ownership option difficult for those of us living in their properties, my suspicion is that someone else in Madison will make it easy. We’ll all be dispersed throughout other areas of the city, and in the interest of building stability in the Allied community, it will be a missed opportunity.

At Least We Have High Hopes For Convenience

The recent meeting at the Boys and Girls Club regarding the redevelopment plan appeared to have a slightly different focus than previous meetings we have attended. Wow, for the first time, it felt like someone thought about what it might be like to live here in these properties in the midst of all the uncertainty of what the future may hold for us. Finally, we were given a glimpse of what the future's options may be. For the first time, I heard what the proposed plans were of where we will go while all the development is taking place, and for the first time, I have heard some options being discussed where some thought went into how the maximum number of us will not have to move twice (at least about half of us residents). The Birch Hill buildings have the most tenants, so in those properties, residents will not have to move until the tail end of the redevelopment plans (maybe a couple years?). For the other tenants, sometime this year, they will be relocated to the Birch Hill buildings. They will be provided some funds to help compensate for the moving expenses and they will receive one month's free rent. That's nice. Thank you for thinking that part through - at least now we can think about what we will need to be doing this year. I have a wall that I really want to paint, but have been holding off thinking it is possible I may be in a different place in 3 months. It sucks not knowing. Once we are all in the Birch Hill properties, we will have the option to move into the new rental units, or wait until the ownership-based housing is developed and move at that time into a condo, town home or single family home at the tail end of Allied. Who knows exactly what the future will hold for any of us, however one thing is clear - at least we can feel like we have a little tiny bit of control over our living spaces and we do not have to worry about getting an unexpected letter saying it's time to go, hurry up and pack. As one Allied Drive city-property resident put it at the Boys and Girls Club meeting, we didn't ask the city to buy our buildings, so the least that can be expected is for the city to think about us as they are making plans for all these changes (which I am optimistic about).

Community Blogging Could Lead to Some Economic Sustainability

I have always wanted to help people in my community become a little more technologically literate. Nowadays, there are so many legitimate ways to earn money online simply by being engaged with a little ingenuity. The Internet is global so what could be a barrier in your local community, could be a strength in your global community. It does not matter where you are from or what language you speak, the Internet serves a purpose of bringing everyone together. I really want to make an effort in 2008 to identify some people in my community who could commit to learning some new skills and one of the things I thought I could do is teach a group of residents how to maintain a blog. What goes with that is learning how to get paid for blogging. I am working on reaching out to people in the community and I hope that this time next month, we will be able to make some headway on getting a class of some sort going. I'll keep you all posted!

What Constitutes Bad Return-On-Investment for Allied Drive?

When evaluating investments, we most often turn to numbers. In the case of the city-owned properties on Allied Drive, it would seem fairly simple to look at the amount of money that Madison’s taxpayers invested into the property, and then work the numbers out to ensure a fair return. However the City of Madison invested into Allied Drive not necessarily to crunch out a profit, but rather to invest in the people and the community. If stability in our community could be achieved, it would ripple out to affect some of the social ailments that plague our city, such as crime, homelessness, unemployment and poverty.

This is all great in principle, however within this process, it is often overlooked that lives are at stake. When our alder, Brian Solomon knocked on our door this weekend to encourage us to come out to another community meeting to voice our thoughts on the redevelopment, it got a little heated. Brian told us that as of a week ago, Phase 1 of the new development process was set to establish all 40 units as 100% Section 8. Now they are talking about 75%. The problem is that there are 30 families that live in the city properties that do not qualify for Section 8 (about 2 families out of 32 do qualify). So if only 10 of us can come back in Phase 1, where are the other 20 supposed to go?

Throughout this process, I have made efforts to remain actively involved and when asked for feedback I have offered it. I have taken personal time to visit with various city people to talk, I have spent time repeatedly offering the fact that I do not qualify for Section 8, and neither do many of my neighbors. When I am told that Phase 1 is likely to be 100% Section 8 just weeks before Phase 1’s redevelopment plan is etched in stone, it sounds like no one ever listened to me, or my neighbors.

The city has been challenged with settling at a solution for the newly acquired properties on Allied Drive in an effort to achieve this goal of stabilizing the Allied Drive community. Within their effort, they hold public meetings where those within the community can freely offer feedback and very often, the need for more Section 8 housing is cited. However who is coming to these meetings and who is raising their voice to guide the redevelopment movement? It is very rare within all these public meetings that I have seen any of my city-property resident neighbors. I have further witnessed some very disturbing methods of manipulating the open meeting process to advance agendas and it all boils down to this: things are not always what they seem. In my conversations with confused or frustrated neighbors, I have encouraged them to write letters to officials and committees that guide the redevelopment process, since many of them are simply unable (or at times unwilling) to come out to public meetings. I thought maybe that would help guide the process. One of my neighbors went the distance to do so … unfortunately, her words also seemed to fall on deaf ears.

It is important to make the distinction between those of us who are really currently living on Allied Drive as leaseholders, and those of us who are living here because of being temporarily taken in by friends and family due to some life circumstance. It seems like if the actual leaseholders in the community are driven away, the goal to achieve stability in our community will be futile. Many of us in the city properties have lived here for 5 years, 10 years and 25 years. That sounds somewhat stable to me, and if those households are driven out of the neighborhood through the Section 8 filter, is the city really achieving its goal?

On top of that, I know that I will have challenges finding a place to live outside of where I am at, if I am asked to move this year. I have some major obstacles that relate to my credit and my background that served as the prime reason Allied Drive became my home. My years on Allied Drive have been tough. My household has had two eviction proceedings in the last year that we successfully combated, but will a new landlord look over the fact that we allowed our rent to back up over $5000 due to extenuating circumstances and consider that we paid that off in 90 days to offset the evictions? If we are displaced, I honestly do not know where to find a landlord that will consider my income without considering my background, my rental payment history or my credit. Two years ago, Allied Drive was the only solution I was able to find after living in a hotel for two months. I am not looking forward to going back to living in a hotel.

I have a puppy to think about. When I look at the investment of faith I am making with the city that there will be a solution for my household within this mess, I am not sure if my investments are sound. I think that the city could potentially put me out through this Section 8 filter, granted I will likely have 60-90 days notice, but sometimes it seems like making an effort to find another place to live in another area of the city and eliminating that unknown in my life would make things a little more stable for me and my household. Who knows, maybe when I am an outsider looking in at the whole Allied Drive mess, I’ll join the rest of Madison in thinking that mass Section 8 is the best solution.

Happy New Year!

We had a great New Years this weekend and 2008 feels like it is going to be a very good year. Happy New Year to everyone out there and I hope that 2008 brings prosperity and happiness to all. Since we are city property residents, I think that 2008 will bring a temporary move, so I am trying to make plans for that, as difficult as that seems - I can't believe how quickly "things" pile up ... we are going on our third year here on Allied Drive and the thought of packing makes my head hurt - hopefully, it won't be too bad! Anyway, Happy New Year!!

The Right Side of Town?

So this morning I was browsing You Tube and I found this video taken on State Street and my fiance walked into the room and asked me if this was Philadelphia in the video. As you can see, it is all State Street in Madison ... I guess it caught him off guard because when you look at our city onscreen, there is this appearance that there are so many things to do and it's lively and fun ... I guess when you are all the way in the corner of the city, festivals are somewhat inaccessible and over time, it builds into this notion that there is nothing to do out here.

We both decided that if we lived closer to downtown, we would likely enjoy Madison a little more. Right now, we eat at McDonalds more than any other restaurant in Madison (because it's right here), and when we want to go hang out somewhere, we really do not have anywhere to go that is close by. So if you live on Allied Drive, Madison consists of McDonalds and ... I can't even finish that sentence. That is sad. More often than not, we don't really go out and do anything out here. I used to go out 1-4 nights a week when I lived in Chicago because I was really active in the arts so I was always either performing or catching the show of one of my performing friends. I miss that and I wish our community had a "scene" ... the rest of Madison seems to ...

Allied Drive Community Meeting Unveils New Plans, What?

The big meeting that took place this weekend to obtain resident feedback on the path of development for the Allied Drive city properties where I live was brought to my attention by my alder, Brian Solomon. I have to say, Brian made a very genuine effort to get the word out. I received a voice mail, a flier taped to my door, and I saw fliers plastered all over the apartment complex in which I live. When Sunday rolled around, I was thinking, damn, it’s Sunday! I have to work tomorrow, I still have laundry to do, I need to make a grocery list, the apartment’s a mess, my puppy feels neglected. But Brian said this was an important meeting. They all are.

There was a decent turnout. All the familiar activists were there. And some new faces. There was also one other city property resident whom I recognized that showed up. It may not have been the town meeting that many were hoping for, but until it is realized that city people speak a different language than us residents, participation will remain where it is.

First of all, we are not trained to read schematics so for some, the diagrams are all just a bunch of shapes. Many community residents at the meeting still thought that the diagrams reflected all of Allied Drive and did not understand that this new development will only impact nine properties. Even when it is all explained to us, we will still harbor on details that may not really impact the overall design because we are not trained in urban planning so we do not really know exactly what to ask. On top of that, nearly half of the city property residents do not speak English as their first language and some need interpreters to even communicate at these meetings. It’s kind of like when someone asks, “How are you?” What can you say? Uh - fine?

In these situations, maybe we have to rely on experts to do what experts do. When it comes down to someone talking about schematics, I get a little impatient. I guess I can afford to trust the experts because if the end result does not fit what I said I wanted a year ago at the community design meeting, I can afford to shop elsewhere for shelter. Many of my neighbors can also afford to shop elsewhere and that is likely why they do not feel the need to give up a Sunday afternoon to hear city people talk about plans. Most of us have faith that the city leaders will come up with a good solution based on the information they have acquired from us. There are some people who live in the 10th district that are next-to-homeless and need a place to live that is affordable and will accommodate a lack of income and they voice their concerns at all these meetings, however I am not sure if this specific Allied Drive redevelopment project of these nine particular buildings is supposed to solve poverty, homelessness, unemployment and underemployment. Until it is understood what the Allied Drive redevelopment project is to achieve, I think that the confusion and communication lapses will persist.

Some people raised concerns about the affordability of the units. However the residents who currently live in the city-owned apartments were not the ones to raise that question. It’s a logical question that would come up if you were asking the world what they think. I wish this place would hold a public meeting for the entire City of Madison to attend and express their concerns about redevelopment. I’d be the first one to say my concern is that I don’t make the income to live here. I bet that if I consume the entire meeting with my questions about affordability, the actual residents that pay rent there would get a little irritated and after a while they will likely stop coming out to the meetings because their questions and concerns are not being addressed. That is precisely why I left the meeting early. I understand the city strives for a solution that will please everyone, so naturally, their job is to listen. They are definitely doing a wonderful job of keeping their ears open. Now that we have a listening ear, the line to express concerns is growing so long because our community as a whole has a lot of concerns to express. However when it comes to this specific redevelopment project for these nine buildings on Allied Drive, our meetings are filled with people who simply do not live here.

The question asked over and over again was "How much will the rent be?" We talk about displacement and we talk about all these programs that would allow residents to remain here, and ideas come forth at these meetings asking the city to consider 100% Section 8 housing in the new development. I know that my household would not qualify for Section 8 because my household income is too high. Would that mean that I would have to move out? My next-door neighbor has made clear to the city that she would not qualify for Section 8. Would she have to move also? My upstairs neighbor would also not qualify, and neither would my neighbors on the second floor, and my friends over in the 2345 building also would not qualify because their incomes would be too high for Section 8. Would they also have to move out? That sounds like displacement to me.

I raised a question at the meeting in the midst of an argument between some community members and Mark Olinger over whether the new development could be 100% Section 8 or just 80% or 70%? There are 32 households remaining in the city properties. "How many of them are Section 8 recipients?" I asked. Mark indicated it was something like 2, maybe 3. That is less than 10%.



The properties that the city acquired are probably among the nicest apartments on Allied Drive, which I know does not say a whole lot, but I know that the criteria to get into these buildings included an income requirement of three times the rent. Rent here is between $550 and $725. Do the math. Our households can afford a mortgage for a first home if we had some help. One of the households in the city properties is paying for two apartments to accommodate their family. I know from sitting on the CDBG Commission that the City of Madison has some great programs for first time homeowners and there are a lot of people in these buildings that would make great candidates for such assistance. Within that prospective, I think that the city properties striving for at least 50% owner-occupied units may help move our community forward (and not out) if the assistance to obtain one of those units is connected to us residents.

It really pisses me off when people talk for me, and many of my neighbors share that sentiment. I live here in the city property so ask me what I can afford and ask me what I want. Ask my neighbors what they can afford. Ask them directly what they want. Don’t rely on an organization or a survey to speak for us and then interpret that turning Allied Drive into projects is the solution. There are only 32 of us left, how hard could that be? There used to be 80 of us, and more and more residents are leaving the city properties, and they are not all moving into substandard conditions. They are moving into better areas of the city into nice properties. If we had comparable properties out here, maybe some of us would not move out of this neighborhood and maybe we could help provide the stability that the city is looking for in this community.

I would be interested in an owner occupied unit that has 3 to 4 bedrooms (with a basement?), and I would like down payment assistance and some counseling to help me with challenges with my credit. If I do not get that here, I will get it elsewhere and that would mean that I will not stay in this community. I do not want to live in the projects.

That’s all I have to say about the meeting this weekend (at least for now!). I’m not going to write about how some Fitchburg residents are so impassioned about fighting the concept of streets opening up Allied Drive into the surrounding neighborhoods. That’s all for another day, but I will say that the Berlin Wall comes to mind.

New Johnny Depp Movie Hits Theaters

Johnny Depp has some serious fans and in my opinion, his best movie moments were not in Pirates of the Carribean. One of my favorite Johnny Depp movies is Secret Window. Perhaps because I love to write, but also because it tells the story of the inner struggles of a man which many could relate to, whether you are a writer or not. There is a scene with the man who accuses Johnny Depp’s character, Mort, of stealing his story that had a line that I liked. Johnny Shooter, who is really Mort’s subconscious in character, questions him about his smoking and Mort says he just picked up on the habit for his health. Later on, he says “I don't care. I'm just gonna smoke. I'm just gonna totally smoke. I'll finish these, go to the store and get a brand new pack, and smoke the shit out of that one.” That was the part of the movie where I was cued that Mort and Johnny Shooter were possibly the same character (because Johnny smoked). It was all very interesting and the movie was very engaging to me.

Johnny Depp was also in Blow, and I don’t know what it is about drug dealer movies that get me so worked up. I’ve never sold drugs and everything I know about selling drugs came from second-hand experience or the movies. Still movies that draw an entire economy around drugs that expand globally, I guess that all intrigues me. Johnny’s character in that movie was named George who goes over to his friend Derek’s house with 100 pounds of blow asking him to sell it. Derek says it will take a year and the scene shifts over a few days later counting stacks of cash to Derek saying “36 hours. I can’t believe I sold it all in 36 hours!” And then George says something about it taking longer to count the cash than it did to sell it. Blow was a good movie too and this movie moment was definitely my favorite Johnny Depp movie moment.

But that may change with his new flick hitting theaters later this month. Sweeny Todd is another Steven King novel turned movie and is about a barber coming out of prison to avenge the death of his wife. An evil barber? I could totally see Johnny Depp rocking that role! See you at the movies!

Thank You City of Madison for Plowing Allied Drive's Snow

I have had to go to the downtown MATC campus about 10 times in the last couple weeks, and the snow banks there are next to impossible to navigate around if you are on foot. Many people in the Allied Drive community are on foot and many of us have no alternative than to walk in order to get to the businesses close by, including Walgreens, McDonalds or Cub Foods. If you are walking with a stroller with multiple small children, the uphill walk to get to the end of Allied Drive is very cumbersome when you factor in snow and ice. I know resources were challenged with all the snow we got, and I am very thankful that the city has contributed to such a great job with the plowing of streets and walkways in the recent days. Thank you!!

Why Mattresses Are Dumped on Allied Drive?

This was a question I have been asking for about a year now and from all those who I have asked, there are several different answers:

1 - When people are evicted, they often do not take their beds with them, so the landlords just dump them on the curb and I guess the sanitation department comes and picks them up.

2 - When people are moving, mattresses are the most common thing that does not get transported, so the owner of the mattress dumps it on the side of the road, again, waiting for the sanitation department to come and pick it up.

3 - This is one that I heard which I will share for all the conspiracy theorists out there, though let me preface, I have no idea if this is true or not. In order for WHEDA to put money into our neighborhood, there are a series of guidelines that must be met as it relates to crime and upkeep. The drug dealers dump furniture out onto our curbs in an effort to keep WHEDA out. Actually, I heard it is not the drug dealers, but rather the drug dealer's drug dealers. Could there be truth to that? I don't know, this is just what I have heard. In my opinion, there are much easier ways to keep WHEDA out of our neighborhood if that was the goal.

4 - Bed bugs are still a problem out here in the community. There are some landlords out here that do not really make an effort to maintain sanitary living conditions and angry tenants will throw their bug infested mattress anywhere to get rid of it. If it is thrown in an inappropriate place, the landlord may move it to the street curb.

The last one is confirmed to be true - one of my neighbors down the street has been trying to resolve a bed bugs problem for about a year now. The landlord is unresponsive. He was so mad, he threw his mattress out the window onto the courtyard. Eventually, it likely ended up on the street side.

I can't complain about the city being my landlord - they do a great job with maintaining things here. I am thankful for that, because I think if my landlord was unresponsive to any bug problems in my home, I am liable to do something just as drastic with my mattress.

The Art of Listening

One of the responsibilities that accompany being a city commissioner for the City of Madison involves reviewing requests for funding and contributing to a voting process which determines if an applying agency is granted all or part of the funding they request. With any grant application, there is a need to identify a problem and articulate a solution that is associated with a dollar amount. As a group, we determine if the agency’s proposal is a viable and sound response to a valid issue, and if the majority is in agreement, the funding moves forward.

One aspect of this process that strikes me is how many agencies develop solutions without incorporating the contributions of the communities affected by the issue. Individuals affected by social ailments are not incapable of contributing or producing a solution.

I seem to have a slightly different prospective because in addition to being on two city commissions, I also work for an agency and serve on a board that responds to needs within the community that I live in. Through all this, I interact with a lot of agencies and a lot of providers, and overall, I have often witnessed people being told what their problem is and then subsequently being told what their solution is. As a resident of Allied Drive, I have often been told what to do to solve my problems. Go to the food pantry or fill out these forms for some other kind of assistance. As one resident, I am saying that is not the long-term solution. No one seems to ask me what I want. Partly because it is assumed that they already know.

You ever see the kung-fu movies where in the midst of a fight scene, two fighters jump kick at each other, but completely miss one another? That is the problem and solution here. As I see it, many community and government agencies, and many people, often fail to listen. When we are in a position of power and responsible for providing solutions, we often forget that we have a responsibility to listen. Really listen. Listen with the purpose of learning and understanding without any preconceived thoughts that you already know what is going on. What you may learn is that the real problem is not what you thought and therefore, the solution was not what you envisioned. This applies to all the leaders in Madison. There are never any waivers to listening and understanding. In other words, just because you are of the same race as those you are trying to serve, or speak the same language, or just because you know someone’s mother, or just because you have known the person since they were a child, does not automatically mean that you fully understand each other.

There are a lot of people out here that want to contribute to better lives for all residents. There are also a lot of people here who want better lives. I don’t know exactly what the path looks like to get there, however I know there can not be just one voice guiding all of us which way to go. Please listen, and allow everyone to have a voice in our efforts to move forward.

This column was originally published in Madison Voices, Allied Drive's community newspaper. Visit their Web site at: MadisonVoices.com

Community Services, For Us, By Us

Recently, Madison Voices reprinted an article that I wrote for India Tribune about my take on Community Services as it affects us on Allied Drive, coming from a multi-cultural prospective of an Allied Drive resident. My main point in the article is how I wish more agencies would listen to residents, and I wish more residents would take a more proactive role in the area of social services. We may not always be able to help ourselves, however we should always have a stake in it. My biggest pet peeve involves agencies that hand-hold residents to the point of paralysis. For example, if I had a driver who took me everywhere I wanted to go, after years and years of being chauffeured around, driving is going to be a very big deal for me. I am very proud to be on the board of the Wellness Center, an organization that offers a great example of how an organization that serves a neighborhood should function. About a third of our board consists of neighborhood residents, and I think it makes a big difference in how our organization functions. It may be frustrating for the rest of the board at times to have to deal with Allied Drama time to time, however the personal touches of our board members add the neighborhood flavor that I often see missing in community efforts that our driven by those outside of our community. Here is the article that was printed in the last Madison Voices:

Working for a non-profit that focuses on ethnic minorities, as well as serving as the minority representative for the Community Services Commission in my city of residence, I tend to view pretty much everything through a lens that identifies differences based on race, ethnicity and culture.

Perhaps Chicago has spoiled me. I am accustomed to our community taking initiative to address the needs of our people. Needless to say, it is annoying to me when I see outsiders of a culture attempting to address a need without fully understanding the cultural dynamics of a community. For example, I live in a small pocket on the outskirts of a capital city, and it seems as no coincidence that my entire neighborhood of about 8 blocks consists predominantly of African Americans, Latinos, Asians and low-income whites. I did not choose to live in this neighborhood. Various circumstances seemed to lead me here, as if the arm of our city’s capital ushered me to this neighborhood because this was where I belonged.

This small roughly 8-block community is fully saturated with a plethora of community organizations. Considering the lens I see things through, it is hard not to notice that most of the organizations are led and executed by middle-class white folks who have said, “I will not be afraid.” Despite the inflated rumors of fights, thugs, and prostitutes and gangs and whatever else the imagination can muster up, they decide “I want to save those people.” Yes, we really are often referred to as “those people.” Without really understanding our backgrounds and our various cultures, the journey to end social ailments proceeds.

They identify what we need. More disability checks. More food pantries. More vouchers for this and that. Can anyone say “crutch”? The Desi-scene in Chicago is not like that. There are still tons of services for our people. Apna Ghar, Indo American Center, and so many others are run by us, for us. If anyone unfamiliar with our culture wants to contribute, they are welcomed, but they have to conform to our culture. Not the other way around.

There needs to be a consciousness of the constant pressure placed upon us all to assimilate into one with some influences being stronger than others. Be conscious of the way you look at things and make conscious decisions that reflect our cultural values. Sometimes that may mean we have to stand up and be the oddball to say “This is how it is. Deal with it.” This voice is so important. We are in the first, second and third generation of Indians here. Our decisions will base how tenth, eleventh and twelfth generation Indians reflect our culture.

I recently visited an Asian-run organization that serves after-school programs for East Asian middle school girls in an effort to address self-esteem and foster self-image consciousness. They were addressing some performance that the girls recently made that was considered provocative. Maybe it was, I don’t know, I was not there. However, I wanted to know whose standard the girls’ performance was being based on? Nearly every Bollywood movie features a sexy, enticing dance scene, and we encourage our six-year old daughters to replicate those dance scenes on stage at our events. Those unfamiliar with our culture may very likely think we are exploiting our children. Were the young Hmong girls interpreting a cultural dance influenced by MTV and hip hop? I don’t know, but that question needs to be asked. Who knows, maybe Asian girls are a little more self-assured than they are given credit for. Is low-self esteem really an issue among Asian girls? Or are we attempting to treat another more predominant culture’s ailment without fully examining its existence within our own?

I live in a community that attempts to convene to address the needs of our neighbors, however our efforts are often seen by others as inefficient and ineffective, and it is often thought that all we do is argue and fight and we don’t get anything done. When you have a dozen or so people representing two generations and cultures encompassing four continents attempting to resolve a problem as something like, oh I don’t know, poverty? Disagreements are bound to occur. However looking at the results of our actions through a different lens, you may see that we all love one another and we do make things happen. We may not hold meetings that are called to order via motions and Roberts Rules. However, is that the only way to make an impact and serve needs? They say Rome was not built by having meetings. Maybe, just maybe, there is some truth to that.

My Dog Ate My Rent, I Swear

So we were getting ready to go pay some bills and as we were getting everything together to walk out of the house with our puppy Max, I told her to go lay down for a minute. Well she did go lay down ... with our check! After having a dog for just a short amount of time, you get to know their facial expressions, and this is the face that my dog makes when she KNOWS she did something she was not supposed to do. I could not believe it! Thankfully, Dane County Credit Union still let us deposit the check because getting a new check from our employer would have likely taken another pay period. For the record, as long as the pertinent information is still intact on the check, it could still be cashed. I wonder if Meyer Management would accept that as a valid excuse for not paying the rent on time?

Kids Playing Football In Courtyard

This was a picture I took after allowing the kids playing football in our courtyard entertain me for a bit. As you can see, there was a variety of ages and both boys and girls playing together, and what I found amusing is how the girls would hug each other after scoring any points. How is that for totally feminizing a testosterone fueled sport? The two oldest looking boys looked like they were so desperate to play, they got anyone and everyone together who was willing to play in order to make a full team. They were calling all the plays and trying to explain to the younger kids exactly what to do in order to execute a play - it was fun watching, especially knowing snow is going to hit any day now ... better enjoy these nice days while they last!